由情人節想到老夫老妻

2007年2月8日 — 30,262 浏览
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轉眼一年一度的情人節又到了.這個西方的情人節在我們那個古老的國度也流行了十幾年了.據說現在國內的年輕人都非常喜歡過這個節目.情人節,光聽名字就這麼浪漫.如果我沒有誤解,西方的情人節不單純是情人過的節日.而是包含了親情與愛情.父女;母子;夫妻;朋友;情人.而國內的人只把情人節與情人分享,甚至連已婚的都極少人過這個節日.當然新婚的例外.

一日,收到一個朋友的郵件,詢問關于移民的事宜.回答之後,很好奇地問她:你老公在國內也算是事業有成,他舍得出來.朋友說我自己帶著孩子出來.孩子現在快念中學了,想讓他到國外接受教育.問她說她老公一個人在國內怎麼辦?她答:什麼怎麼辦?都老夫老妻了.

不知道是不是每個華人都輕視老夫老妻這四個字.因為像朋友這樣為了孩子,為了身份,為了事業兩地分居的真不在少數.他們都認為這理所當然.

很多時候我都想不明白:到底是華人夫妻感情都特別好,完全經得起長期分离的考驗.真的如古詩:兩情若是久長時,又豈在朝朝暮暮.還是說在華人眼中,金錢,事業,孩子的前途絕對都比夫妻間的感情重要許多.事實是已經不止一個朋友告訴我,夫妻分居兩地的時間久了,真的會無話可說.

為什麼我們都看不起老夫老妻這四個字?沒有一天天的耳鬢斯磨,沒有一日日的相濡以沫.沒有十幾年幾十年的患難與共,誰又擔得起老夫老妻這四個字?

有人說:夫妻是這世上最奇怪的關系.沒有任何血緣關系的兩個人,卻一起撫育兒女,一起赡养老人.一起走過人生的風風雨雨.榮辱與共.

給了我們生命的父母,終有一天會老去,會离開我們.我們給予生命的兒女終會長大,終會成家立室有自己的世界.到時候與我們相伴走過余生的就是老夫老妻.俗語說得好:少來夫妻老來伴.有什麼比老來有個相知的老伴更安全更溫暖?現在許多喪偶的老人會再次走進婚姻的殿堂.相信絕大多數不是為了身理上的需要,而是心靈的寂寞難以消除.

應該承認,老夫老妻早已激情不在.有的只是濃厚的親情.但是能夠執子之手走完一生的絕對是靠親情,而不是激情.

在這個情人節即將來臨之際,祝願所有的老夫老妻都健康快樂!

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  29. 趴趴 Says:

    哈,我也是打五笔的哦

  30. 遠方 Says:

    謝謝Milo Milo 每次都有大段的留言.留言和文章同樣顯示你的文采和思想. 觀點一致的時候是:網友所見略同.不一致時可以:求同存异.

    愛米的表揚讓俺在這里偷偷地沾沾自喜.真是沒得治了.呵呵…

  31. 爱米 Says:

    遠方的文章和留言总给人以启迪,受益匪浅,繁體也好看,佩服能用五笔打繁體。 小时候看古书都是繁體。

  32. Milo Milos Says:

    我觉得探讨这样的话题没有意义。

    婚姻,当然是用爱来维持了。为什么搞那么复杂。亲情,那就一辈子跟爹妈过好了,用不着婚丧嫁娶。

    这是个伪命题。

  33. 遠方 Says:

    親情和激情從不對立.兩個人因最初的激情而結合.當激情過後,日積月累的親情讓他們的婚姻更牢固.

    為什麼許多人都說:相愛容易相處難.因為相愛只需要激情.但相處需要關愛,寬容,忍讓,理解,信任.需要少許的犧牲.

    你說得對,當你能保保持一種童真,從生活中找到各種樂趣.就會充滿活力,有新鮮感.

    但現在我們說的是婚姻,是你可以幾年,十幾年,幾十年地對著一個男人或女人.最初的激情能維持多久?一個月,一年還是幾年?

    很早就有人這樣形容過夫妻的關系:說對方就像自己的一只左手.用右手摸左手,能有激情嗎?用自己的右手摸左手就是什麼感覺都沒有.但沒有人會說我可以不要左手.那是自己身體的一部份.就是我們說的親情.

    兄弟,等你結婚十年後我們再來重新討論這個話題.

    當然,有可能你可以讓我們看到:婚姻是用激情來維持…祝福你.:)

  34. Milo Milos Says:

    我不明白,你们为什么总要把亲情和激情对立?

    这两个是反义词吗?

    我们的人生中,即使日常平凡琐碎的生活中,难道就没有激情吗?

    有没有激情,一是看两人是否真正相爱,二还要看你自己是个什么样的人。

    如果你是个在平凡生活中始终保持一种童真能找到各种细微的乐趣的人,你们的生活,永远都会有活力,有新鲜感。

    是中国人自己活得太辛苦罢了。亲情和激情之间,并非天然对立。

  35. 遠方 Says:

    回答愛米:用五筆輸入. 第一次下載五筆時,下載了晨曦五筆.是繁體的. 一直用到現在.想過下載個簡體的,但是下載了好幾次都因帶病毒,安裝不了. 只好作罷.是不是看起來太累?

  36. Paul Says:

    同意!

  37. 爱米 Says:

    能夠執子之手走完一生的絕對是靠親情,而不是激情.

    请问远方为何用繁体写文?是拼音输入吗?

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