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感谢赞美我们的主神!在这个复活节里,他让我的女儿和我们全家再一次与主一起经历同埋葬同复活的日子。女儿在洗礼前后各写了一篇文字来表述她对神的那份爱的回应。愿神悦纳这份清纯的表白!我将分部分登载在这里。原文是英文,我将其译成中文。

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受浸前感怀 Pre-Baptism Feelings By CJ

我不得不承认我此刻非常焦急等待明天–复活节–的来临。这是因为明天的确将实实在在成为我一生中最重要的日子。明日,我将要走出来面向每一个人大声对他们说:“是的,我将把我的全部生命献给我的救主!” I guess that I have to admit that I am kind of anxious about tomorrow, Easter Sunday. This is THE biggest day of my life, after all! It’s the day when I am reaching out to everyone and telling them, “Yes! I will give up my life for my saviour!”

也正是在这一天,我终于从真正意义上开始成为神的大家庭中的一员,参与敬拜赞美神的各样事情中的一分子。我是多么的自豪这地上数以忆计的人们愿意把自己摆上行进在主耶稣指给我们的生命大道上。It is also the day when I finally join the whole Christian community and become part of everything that goes on at GOD. I feel so proud of the billions of people worldwide who press on in a crusade for Christ.

此刻我的身体虽有点不舒服,但我心里明白,在神面前受浸,这是我一直期望要做的。我的心已经被圣灵感动,我无法再等下去一刻。我一边听着ZoeGirl合唱组的“绝美的名字”(Beautiful Name),我的心感到为了神那绝美的圣名,我已准备好和愿意“刚强有力和全然摆上”。However, despite the nervousness in the pit of my stomach, I know that I have wanted to do this. I am pumped and cannot wait! Listening to ‘Beautiful Name’ by ZoeGirl, I feel that I am ready and that I am willing to “be strong and press on” for the sake of His beautiful name.

我愿意尽我所能全然服侍他。我愿意尽我所能把我的心和灵全然献给他。我知道明天将会有那么多的弟兄姐妹们注视着我,但是也将会有全世界数以亿计的人们,象主耶稣一样,在灵里张开他们的臂膀等待着我,向我走过来拥抱我,说:“欢迎加入神的大家庭中,我们都是神的儿女了!”I want to be able to service all that I am to Him. I want to be able to give all my heart and soul to Him. I know that tomorrow there will be all those people watching me but, spiritually, there will be the billions of people standing there with open arms, reaching over to welcome me into the big family of Christians.

我一直在思想我将会永远感谢神把我带到他的生命里。我也无法相信他为什么拣选我成为他的儿女,因为我感受到我是那么的不配得他那如此丰盛和奇异的恩典。这个世界上发生着如此众多的神迹奇事,可是我感到我被神拯救的确是一个神迹。I think that I will be forever grateful to the Lord for leading me to Him. I cannot believe that He would choose me to become part of His family. I feel so undeserving of such bountiful and abundant grace. I know that there are so many miracles in the world, and I feel that my salvation is one of those miracles.

当我回望反思我的过去,我明白神已经在我的生命中给了我巨大的力量去面对世事,他领我到“青草地”和“溪水旁”。他的作为是那么的奇妙,那么的伟大以至于我无法找到合适的词汇来表述他。When I look back, I reflect on my life so far. I know that there has been a greater power in my life. God has led me to the ‘green pastures’ and the ‘still waters’ in my life. He is so amazing and is so wonderful that I don’t have a word to describe Him.

我真的是感到他是我一生中唯一的需求。有时,我会经历一些难处,我很惭愧我没能象我应该的那样去信靠他。在圣经里,一直不断地在提醒我们只有他才是我们唯一的支柱和磐石。这再一次让我想起那些为神摆上的宣教士。他们无畏地来到未耕之地,为着神的缘故,广传福音。他们的奉献摆上是因为他们的灵与神合而为一。这是我应该效法的榜样。I just feel that He is the only one that I need in my life. Sometimes, I come across hardships, but I don’t trust in Him as much as I should’ve. In the Bible, there are constant reminders that He is the only one that we should all need. I mean, the missionaries are such great examples. They boldly go to places that few people have ever gone before, yet they are fearless simply because they have the spirit of the Lord in them.

好像Bethany Dillon在歌中所唱的:“虽然我四周拥有一切可是你是我需求的全部,虽然我仅仅剩下我自己但你仍是我想要的一切。”我也在一直不断地被提醒无论发生什么事,主仍然在我身旁。无论我一生中遭受什么样的苦痛,他已所受的远超过我们的千倍万倍。在他手上的钉痕和钉洞也不断向我展示他虽然知道被钉在十字架上那伤痛是多么大的代价,但这一切都是为这个世界上那与他为敌的所受。他知道若有一个他心爱的儿女离开他而去,那他心中的苦痛也会如十字架上所遭受的一样。他绝对知道这一切的发生。As Bethany Dillon sings: “You are all I need when I’m surrounded, you’re all I need when I’m by myself” we are constantly reminded that He is there no matter what. Whatever pain we are suffering in life, He has already suffered a pain that’s thousands, millions times more hurtful. His scars and holes in His hands are reminders that He knows. He knows how much it hurts to feel as if the whole world is against you. He knows how much it hurts when a loved one turns away. He knows.

当我知道神与我相联以后,我感受到无止境的关怀和安慰,我也感受到他那对我的独特的方式。神明白我所思所想,也明白他是如何让我奇特地感受主那圣洁和爱怜。有时,在我生活实际中会有各种各样丑陋的感觉,一种无爱怜无恩典的想法。但神总是在那个时刻出现在那里,他将我回心转意,直接面对向他。神事实上知道我那种感觉和想法发生的全过程。实在是感谢赞美我们的主神!他让我知道在这个世界上只有一位神,他在我生命存留的每一部分都能全然仰望信靠。I receive a lot of comfort knowing that my saviour can relate to me. I feel that this way, He can truly understand what and how I feel. Sometimes there is that feeling of ugliness and lack of love, but I know that there is always someone that I could turn to, someone who knows and has been through exactly how I feel. I am so thankful and so elated to know that there is One in the world that I can trust with every part of my being.

有时我突然发现神将我的生命变得如此美丽和整全以至我不得不吸一口气来赞叹神的作为。我很难想象如果每天没有这为怜悯关怀慈爱的神,我将不知会是什么样子,这个世界也将会是什么样子。想象一下,若没有空气,没有水,没有阳光, ......,那会是多么可怕的情景啊!灵里的生命也是如此。若没有神,我们的生活将失去支撑点,你说对吗?I am awed at the breathtaking way that He makes me beautiful and whole again. I cannot imagine now how it would be like to not have this caring, loving God with you everyday. How horrible would it be! There would be not point of living, is there?

我想拥有这令人鼓舞的气息也想将它带到这个世界的地极。伟大的神那美好的福音太奇妙无比以至我不能自私地仅仅让我拥有在我自己的生命中。我也想要这美好的福音分享给那些还没有遇到那位独一真神的人们。我们的生命中若没有他将会无法永存。I want to take this inspiration and bring it to the ends of the Earth. The good news of the wondrous Lord is too amazing to hold back and kept selfishly all to myself. I want to give it to all those people that have yet to meet the One who I cannot live without.

我清楚地明白我已经感受到神对我的呼叫去把他美好的信息传给那些仍散落在地球上不同角落的人们。我愿意奉献我的全部作为祭品献给他。毫无疑问他绝对配得我为他所做的一切。I know that I have felt the calling of the Lord to give His good message to the people that are still lost in the world’s ways. I am willing to give all that I am to Him and, live as a sacrifice for Him. He is definitely worthy of all that I could give to Him.

提到这一点,又让我感到我是那么的不配得从父神为我那如此巨大的牺牲。我简直难以想象:若我是一位父亲,将自己亲生的儿子为别人的罪送遣到这个世界任人鞭打任人唾弃任人辱骂最后还要钉死在十字架,我将会是什么样的苦痛难受啊!!I just feel that I am so undeserving of such a great sacrifice from the Heavenly Father. I could not imagine how much it would pain me if I were the one that I had to give a son up to the torment of the world.

可是,这一切在两千年前的受难日神为我们已经成就了。主耶稣将他爱我们的凭据和爱我们的心通过为我们的罪死在十字架上而完全显明。他在三天后的那个早晨从死里复活了!他的复活战胜了死亡带给我们希望和生命中永远的惊喜。However, it has already been done, a Good Friday some 2000 years ago. Jesus had shown the depth of His love to all of us by dying on the cross for us. He rose 3 days later, on Easter morning, to give us hope and astonishment.

神把他自己给了我们从而给我们充满了生活的希望和梦想。我不认为会有任何人能比那奇妙的救主更值得颂赞和得荣耀。我只能为他在我一生中不断倾泻出的恩福献上无限的感恩。神在我身上这样的祝福实在是太多,无论如何感谢也不能倾尽表述。He filled all of our desires and dreams by giving Himself to us. I don’t think there is anyone who is more deserving of praise and glory than our wonderful Lord. I thank Him over and over of all His blessings on my life. There is just simply too much in my life to thank Him for.

我想给每个人分享神在我生命中奇妙的带领和改变。明天我在复活节上的洗礼将向众人显明这种改变。从此我将把我的一生时间溶进赞美和爱这位伟大的神!我求神将他的眼目从不要转离我的一生,我也求神自始至终对我有心来爱他和顺服他感到欢喜。也求神能让我渴望以他的名为他做一些事。I want to everyone to know the changes that he has made in my life. My baptism tomorrow will push into a lifetime of changes and a lifetime of praising and loving the awesome Lord. I want Him to look upon my life and feel proud that I have loved and obeyed Him as much as my heart desired. I want my Lord to know how much I desire to do great things in His name.

我也希望明天的洗礼将向众人见证我已经从“瞎眼的人”成为一个能看见对生命的主并跟随他的人。见证我将成为对一切神的美好事物存有无限好奇心的人。至此,我想在心中的“看见”来完全认识那奇妙的创造主神,庆贺他赐予我那伟大的爱和恩典。我也想借此让其他弟兄姐妹们看到神在我生命中的改变和不同。再一次“看见”无论什么发生,神自有永有的在那里作随时的帮助。I also want to witness to everyone that I have changed from a ‘blind’ to a person who is bursting with life, bursting with curiosity for all things good. I want to know my wonderful Creator and celebrate His wonderful love and grace. I want others to see the difference in my life, and see that there is a God in this world.

作为基督徒,我最大的目标之一就是领很多人归到已经给予我很多的神之下。他已经爱我也将永远爱我。在这种爱中,我感到是那样独特奇妙,所以我也想让其他人来认识神和分享他的爱。我难以想象一个人若生命历程中不认识神那一定会象丢失一切东西一样,虚空的灵就不会被满足。One of my biggest goals as a Christian is to lead many people to this Lord that has given me so much. He has loved and will always love me. I feel so special and so amazing to be in such love. I want others to know Him as well and share HIS love. They truly don’t know what they are missing out in life. They will never fill the void in their spirit without the Creator.

认识主,让我拥有了奇妙和丰盛的爱。我是如此庆幸神让我在他永不止息的爱中有份。他的爱从来不会背叛我,也不会离弃我。我已经完全预备好将主给我的和领受到的全部分享出去。I have found a wonderful and abundant love. I am so blessed to be part of this eternal love that will never betray me or stray me. I am fully prepared to give all that I am to the Lord and, tomorrow, I can’t wait for others to see my testimony of giving all that I am to Him.

写于2005年复活节前夕

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